Goldblum’s Is The Trippiest Jewish Restaurant That Never Existed

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In a recent video from MTV’s “After Hours with Josh Horowitz,” Jeff Goldblum announces that his latest venture is a restaurant. And the Jewish-born movie star is very, very into it.

“Spared no expense,” he says, quoting one of his most famous films.

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Horowitz runs into Goldblum on the street in New York, and is invited to try out the new restaurant, called, of course, Goldblum’s. But when he arrives at the subterranean café (complete with Goldblum’s face printed on the door and menu), he finds that everyone in the place is, in fact Jeff Goldblum. The maitre’d, waiter, busboy, piano player, bartender- all Goldblum. But Horowitz is the only one who notices anything unusal.

The sketch squeezes in plenty of references to Goldblum’s films, from “The Big Chill” to “The Fly” to “Jurassic Park.”

Would Goldblum’s count as a “Jewish” restaurant, just because of its proprietor? Probably not. A brief shot of the menu shows pretty treif-heavy fare, including Jurassic Porkchops, and Bacon-Wrapped Independence Dates. However, the Buckaroo Banzai Brisket sounds like it could be a creative take on a classic.

The sketch was filmed in Pravda, a Russian caviar bar in Nolita. The traditional Slavic fare served there does have some similarities with Ashkenazi cuisine, with both having roots in Eastern Europe. Dishes include potato pancakes, smoked salmon, and pickled herring.

Sadly, diners hoping for a real Goldblum’s, perhaps with Prince of Egypt Charoset or Earth Girls Are Cheesy Blintzes, will have to keep waiting.

J-Connection: Jeff Goldblum’s family was Jewish. As a child, Goldblum belonged to an Orthodox synagogue and had a bar mitzvah.

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